Where I stand...contently single
As I said before, he sent flowers to work and left many, many messages about how he wants to make things right and he needs me, etc. etc.
I finally called him back last night to ask that he stop calling and move on.
I explained that it was over and I don't think I can ever feel the same about him again after the months of lying, etc.
After about a half hour I told him I had to go and please stop calling and please move on and I think he has FINALLY gotten the message. I have not heard from him since - including any messages.
Just to clear the air...I did not kick him out!!
I have had a lot of people ask if I feel bad for kicking him out onto the street...
here is what happened.....
I found the bank statement with the Casino ATM withdrawls on Monday-he promised to change and get help...on Thursday we had to go to a dinner party and in the car he was acting high-I asked him if there was something wrong with him or if he was using- he called me a bitch, asshole, etc. and said he was leaving...he said he could not do anything right and he was leaving and that I should find someone that could actually love me to move in...so I said "maybe you are right".
He gave me his key and left that night with a few clothes...I told him if he left he was not coming back and he left.
I spent the rest of the night packing his stuff....he stopped by the next afternoon and took his phone charger and told me to throw everything else in the dumpsters.
I called his brother and took everything to his brothers house and that was that (i am not spiteful enough to throw everything away even if he asked me to)!
So, you see, I did not throw him out - he left of his own free will and in the process managed to call me every horrible name in the book.....
Yes, I am sad sometimes... yes, I morn for what I thought we were working toward together...but no, I did not choose this - I only choose to stay sober and take care of myself from here on out!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks for listening!